Friday, November 24, 2006
[[Busted]]
when should i go home?? it seemed that if i were to go home... i would waste time here n there, though it's not as though i spend time fruitfully in hall... i want to go home.. as usual, eat dinner with the family.. then go see ah gong... one week never see him only, he dont recognise me alredy... last week when i went.. i can see that im not a familiar face to him... he can't even remember my name... it's my fault that i didnt go see him the week before.... i thought it was ok to rush maths... in the end, it was stupid.. turns out.. i fucked up the paper... i forgot the formulae... i knew how to do the integration... but without the formulae.. i cldn't start... idiot... i missed a visit for nothing..
i wanna go out sia..... i wanna look for that NUM top which may have 'Tennis' imprinted on it... i hven gone to collect my outstanding iShop, though i dont really know where that came from.. initially arranged with Wei to go get it.. but she isn't free.. dont think i'll be gg either.. hven done alot of thgs either.... hven email the below to my Ma as i had intended..
After 21 years of marriage, I discovered a new way of keeping alive the spark of love. A little while ago I had started to go out with another woman. It was really my wife's idea."I know that you love her," she said one day, taking me bysurprise. "But I love YOU," I protested."I know, but you also love her."The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who has been a widow for 19 years, but the demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally. That night I called to invite herto go out for dinner and a movie. "What's wrong, are you well?" she asked. My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news."I thought that it would be pleasant to pass some time with you," I responded."Just the two of us."She thought about it for a moment then said "I would like that very much."That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous.When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our date. She waited in the door with her coat on.She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel's."I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed," she said, as she got into the car. "They can't wait to hear about our meeting". We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. my mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady.After we sat down, I had to read the menu to her. Her eyes could only read large print. Half way through the entree, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me.A nostalgic smile was on her lips. "It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were small," she said."Then it's time for you to relax and let me return the favor," I responded.During the dinner we had an agreeable conversation, nothingextraordinary - but catching up on recent events of each others lives. We talked so much that we missed the movie.As we arrived at her house later, she said "I'll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you". I agreed."How was your dinner date?" asked my wife when I got home. "Very nice. Much more so than I could have imagined," I answered.A few days later my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn't have a chance to do anything for her.Some time later I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place mother and I had dined.An attached note said: "I paid this bill in advance. I was almost sure that I couldn't be there but, nevertheless, I paid for two plates - one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know what that night meant to me. I love you."At that moment I understood the importance of saying, in time: "I LOVE YOU" and giving our loved ones the time that they deserve.Nothing in life is more important than God and your family and friends.Give them the time they deserve, because these things cannot be put off til "some other time".Someone once said "I've learned that, regardless of yourrelationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.I think this is true with your in-laws, grandchildren, sisters,brothers and your friends. Anyone that means something to you-you should spend time with them and let them know how much they mean to you as often as you can.To love and to be loved iseverything..........................................this semester has very much passed me by... i cant get the drive to study... esp for subjects like Econs and Computing... guess i just didn;t like them.... bcos although physics and chem are tough.. i will still do them though.. at a microscopic snail's pace though... what the fuck is wrong with me man....
guess it's bcos i'm an interest-driven person.. when i know what im doing, what i'm heading for.. i wont ever stop, ever.... unless i dunno wats the next step to take.... but then again.. this is also my bane... when i do something i dont like, or see no point in doing.. i wont do it... thats the case for econs and computing.... i never liked them in the first place.. so its damn hard to push myself...
maybe i tot too far.. i ask, so far after all these? after all these studying.. its same damn thing i have been doing for the past 2 decades... studying is one thing... wats stupid is the education system... even at this level, its still the same... i dont see how our system can cultivate any thinking minds... we are just bloody zombies.... it doesnt encourage to explore.... downright stupid....
AHHH.. i dunno la.... FUBAR
i was here @
2:33 PM.